Things Noticed Around 2 to 3 Weeks

Orion’s vision seemed to be better than is expected at that age. He really spent a lot of time gazing at certain things, especially the black metal spirals that are inset in our headboard and make a contrast against the lighter wall. He also loved looking at the pictures I had hung over the changing table. I didn’t think of it when I put them together, but they are perfect for a newborn because they are black and white. The changing table has become one of his favorite places to hang out. He is also definitely attracted to orange and red. Oh yeah – one other black and white thing he liked to look at was the heating/AC vent on the ceiling above our bed. That was another way I knew he could see farther than the 8 inches that is standard for newborns.

We were able to hire a doula to stay with me during the week. At the end of 2 weeks off for Ron, he was planning on taking at least another week off. His boss decided they were desperate for him to come back and offered to pay for full time help for the next 4 weeks! We got some references from Octavia and chose a woman named Fanny Brown. She was perfect for us because she was willing to do whatever we needed and even has 3 dogs of her own at home. Our puppy, Kona, was just over 6 months at this point, so we needed somebody who could deal with that energy.

One of the first things Fanny commented on was how Orion would suck on his own fist for comfort. Supposedly babies are not supposed to start doing that until they are about 3 months. He did like getting swaddled though as most newborns do. Ron didn’t think he did, but we had just never done it right. Fanny showed us how to do it so his arms were held better and it definitely made a difference for sleeping. Newborns tend to wake themselves up because of the way they jerk their arms and they end up sticking their hands in their faces. One problem though was that he was pretty much too big to be swaddled in the standard size receiving blanket! Fanny knew of a certain brand that was bigger, so we got some of those and had some success for awhile.

Fanny also taught me a number of other tricks – some baby related and some not, such as:

Use a Q-tip to apply cream to the babies bottom – sterile for him and no mess for me.
Viva paper towels are amazingly absorbent and make great changing table accessories, especially for boys…
Put your sponges in the dishwasher to sterilize them. Gets rid of that yucko stink they always get right away.
Tuck a receiving blanket very tightly around a baby right after you put them down to sleep in a crib - this makes them feel like they are still being held.

There is a little bit more that relates to the first few weeks, but I want to get another entry in so I will save it for next time.

Silly Doggy

First Week or so - Trials and Tribulations

One of the first things I noticed about Orion was that his frenulum was very long – all the way to the end of his tongue – it actually pulled and made a dent if he tried to stick it out. I was surprised Rasmia didn’t say anything about it and I was kindof out of it so I didn’t mention it. I thought I had remembered reading something in the Dr. Sears book about that interfering with breastfeeding, so I looked again and sure enough that is what it said. He seemed to be latching on OK, but I was still worried because I had gone through such a hard time with Sarah when I thought I was doing it correctly then as well. Our wonderful DO, Razmig Krumian, had agreed to pay us a house visit and when he saw it he said that this was about as bad as it gets. He definitely recommended having it clipped and gave us the names of a couple ENTs.

The first couple of days seemed OK although he didn’t sleep too much. He seemed to only be content sleeping on my chest and I couldn’t sleep that way. Maybe I had gotten too used to sleeping on my side at the end of pregnancy. It also seemed like I was just wound up because I couldn’t sleep anyway. I remembered being the same way the first day or two with Sarah. With a newborn you just worry about every little sound they make. After a few days I got seriously tired and then I was falling asleep sitting up even! So at that point I was able to lie down after a feeding at night and usually get him to go to sleep with me. Actually he started sleeping at night almost right away. I did the same thing I had done with Sarah, which was to keep all the lights out or low and no talking. Somehow that seems to communicate that it is sleep time and it is the only thing about Orion that has stayed consistent.

The biggest trial we faced turned out to be connected to breastfeeding. Within the first week Orion started to get into inconsolable crying spells at night. I thought he was already starting with colic and was getting mentally prepared for dealing with it for a few months. I have to admit I felt bad because I thought I had done every possible thing recommended to avoid colic. Once he started crying he would go for a few hours and not eat the whole time. One night, out of desperation, (or call it mother’s intuition) I said we should try to give him a bottle of some of the milk I had pumped. Ron got it ready and Orion sucked it down in about 30 seconds. I was shocked. Here we were rocking and singing to our baby and it turned out he was starving. Not only did he drink it down but he ate more from the breast and then slept for about 4 hours straight afterwards. The poor thing was sleep deprived because he had to spend so many waking hours eating to try and get enough food. I had been to so many breastfeeding seminars, La Leche League meetings and read books about breastfeeding and not one of them ever said a baby might refuse the breast with a bad latch. All I had heard about was possible soar nipples, low weight gain and increased air intake. So at this point I knew the frenulum was a much bigger issue than we had realized and we really stepped up the efforts to get it clipped.

I made an appointment with Dr. Mikaelian. The first one got cancelled because he was called away on emergency. I was getting a bit panicky at this point because we kept needing to give Orion bottles and I was worried about running out of pumped breast milk. He also seemed to be getting increasingly fussy at the breast. At first we only needed to give him about an ounce to take away his frustration and then he would go right back to the breast, but sometimes it would take more than that or not work at all.

We decided to consult a lactation consultant and she turned out to be very helpful. She gave me some good tips about how to get the baby going and how to get some extra milk into him. Through this whole time, Octavia was also very helpful and made herself available at any time. She also put me in touch with another consultant who talked to me over the phone. I also spent some time talking to the La Leche League people. Although nobody could really solve our problem until the procedure was done, it was just comforting to talk to other women who were encouraging. I felt like giving up at some points knowing that I was frustrating my son. It seemed like it would be easier to just pump and switch to bottles, but I kept pushing through. The day finally came to see the doctor and of course it turned out he would only do an office visit. I had just assumed the procedure would happen on the same day because it was so minor. At least he squeezed us in at the next available date and we only had a few more days to wait.

There was not an overnight difference because I think Orion was so used to being frustrated at the breast, but things did get slowly better over the next few days and we were getting by with no extra bottles. Some of the other things that really helped me were listening to music I found really moving, especially the Leap of Faith album by Kenny Loggins. Babies can sense frustration and tension, which I would experience every time he refused the breast, so I needed to focus on calming things. Certain songs made me very emotional and I noticed that would often trigger a letdown. The other thing that was a huge help was keeping an image of The Star card from the tarot in my mind. This card represents to me a sense of channeling the positive energy in the universe through myself and out to the rest of the world. When meditating on thid image I could relax better and picture sending that calmness to Orion. I would physically lower my shoulders to release the tension. Ron would usually hold his hands if they were flailing around and send him calming energy as well. Sometimes I found it depressing to think I needed breastfeeding to be a two person job, but I mentioned this to the consultant and she said it is surprising how often that is the case in the early weeks.

Despite all the frustrations, I was often filled with a sense of overwhelming joy and love. Sometimes it would be so strong that I would just sit there and cry. I telling Ron that I was crying from happiness because I was worried he would think I was depressed. Above it all, I know how fast the first few years disappear, so no matter what the trials are, they will be gone before I know it.

all grown up

Orion's Birth Story

My son, Orion Lawrence Prague, was born on September 3 at 1:15am, weighing 10 pounds, 2 ounces.




I want to start by writing about the labor so I will remember it well. We chose to have a waterbirth at home. Our midwife's name was Rasmia Tebo, and we also had a doula in attendance named Octavia Lindlahr. I had a pretty uneventful pregnancy besides a few aches and pains. The due date had come and gone and I was getting worried I would have to be induced, like I was with Sarah. My midwife seemed unconcerned and kept saying he just wasn’t ready. I think she was convinced my due date was wrong, and he wasn’t really late, but my intuition told me something different. I had a feeling I was going to be late again.

So when it got to be a week past my due date, I decided to get acupuncture to move things along. I went into a local clinic to ask if they had any experience with inducing labor, and the lady told me she was 4 for4, so I booked an appointment for the coming Thursday. (I felt weird - like I was booking a scheduled Csection – picking the birth date and all ). The day of the appointment, I went in at noon. I had been having some contractions that made my belly very hard, but they didn’t seem too different than the Braxton Hicks I had been having all along, and they were still mostly painless with just a little cramping. I had also been spotting and seeming to lose my mucous plug over the last couple days, so maybe things would have moved along on their own, but I didn’t want to take any chances.

After the acupuncture things seemed about the same for awhile, with the contractions being a bit more crampy. By 3 pm they seemed to be getting a bit more regular at about 5 minutes apart, but still very mild as far as any pain was concerned. We called Rasmia anyway, just to put her on alert. At this point, I still wasn’t sure if I was really “in labor” after all I had heard about false labor. After a couple of hours, the contractions got to about 3 minutes apart, but still were not too painful. Then the pain started increasing, and it looked like my labor was going to follow the pattern of contractions staying at the same timing while just the sensations increased. Fortunately, I wasn’t having hardly any back pain, which I had expected since I had so much with Sarah.

Time to get things ready, just in case...

Kona wonders, "What the heck is this thing in my living room?"



Poor doggie is not going to get much chance to find out. Out you go, spaz.



We were starting to get a little nervous, because 3 minutes apart seemed so close together considering we were told to call the midwife at 5 minutes. So we finally decided to have Rasmia come over to check things out, and she came around 8pm. We had also called my friend Taira, who is pregnant right now as well, and Ron's mother, Rose. They both got here a bit before Rasmia. I had a pretty good feeling things were not too far along, even though I had been 3 minutes apart for quite some time. Sure enough – only 2 cm dialated. Rasmia predicted I would have the baby around 6am, but I hadn’t told her about the acupuncture.... I felt bad that I had kindof gone over her head. Also, my water broke during the internal exam, which made me think things would start rolling because that was how it had been with Sarah. Rasmia didn't think things were going to pick up, so she left, and so did Rose.


Taira was undecided and stuck around a bit as Ron offered to go to Wendy’s, and she wanted a Frosty haha. Well hurray for the pregnancy appetite because things definitely started to cruise along. She was a great support and also the one who took all the awesome pictures! I was getting a bit worried because the pain was increasing to a place I was having a hard time dealing with it and I thought I was going to have to go through it all night. I was using the O sound with long breaths because I had read that would help open the cervix. I tried some of the breathing we learned in class, but the O seemed to work better for me.

I kindof lost track of the time at this point and was just concentrating on breathing. I have no idea when I was at 4, 5, 6cm, etc. because there was nobody there to check me. According to Ron, things seemed different around 11:30 as far as the sounds I was making, so that is when he thinks I hit transition. Funny enough, I had gotten in the tub just after 11. You are not supposed to get in until at least 5 cm because it can slow things down, but I didn’t know where I was and the pain was bad enough that I just didn’t care. Looking back, I wish I had known I could get in sooner. I think I would have enjoyed the water much more. Everyone says the water makes the pain less, but that was not my perception. I think it just made the pain easier to cope with in a sense because I had more freedom of movement. But maybe the difference would have been more noticable earlier along.



Taira called Rasmia at about 11:45, and not long after that I started to feel a little bit of an urge to push at the end of the contractions. I couldn’t believe it was real because everything seemed to happen so fast. I remember saying to Ron I wonder if I am imagining it because I just want it to be over with. He said I hadn’t imagined it with Sarah, so I probably wasn’t imagining it now. I asked Ron later if he was getting nervous at that point because we were without the midwife, and he said he had been. He never acted like it though. And to think, he almost had to catch the baby!

Rasmia arrived at 12:40, and as soon as she got through the door and heard me, she knew I was ready. She set up her stuff, checked me to make sure and said to start pushing. Wow, was I relieved. I was so scared she was going to say I was only 5 cm or something. Pushing definitely seemed harder than it had with Sarah. She seemed to almost fly out with no effort as my body pushed involuntarily. Maybe it was because I had the epidural then. I think because I could feel everything, I was a little more apprehensive about the pain of crowning. I had heard alot about the "ring of fire", so I was nervous about experiencing that. Also, the sensation of the baby coming down the birth canal was more painful than I expected. Every time I had a contraction, Rasmia would reach inside me and it felt like she was pulling my insides apart. Come to think of it, she probably was! In between contractions, I still felt no pain and was totally lucid.

Here is my pushing face...

...and my resting face. In this picture I was almost fully crowned! Ask me to see the unedited version sometime haha.

At some point, Rasmia said I was almost done and that the head wasn’t moving back anymore in between contractions. I remember thinking she couldn’t be telling me the truth because I couldn’t feel any stretching sensation. Looking at the pictures later, I was amazed to see myself totally relaxing in between contractions with Orion's head almost fully crowned! Then after a couple more pushes she said the head was out. I couldn’t believe it. I had never felt the “ring of fire”. It turned out I needed 2 stitches, so I don’t really understand how I didn’t feel myself tear. I have seen videos of women screaming "I'm tearing!" even when they aren't. The only pain I felt was inside. The biggest shock I had was after Orion’s head was out. That was supposed to be the worst part, so I figured I was over the hump. Then I heard Rasmia saying, “Would you look at that – he is holding his head up in the water!” He was moving his whole body around while still inside me, and that was one of the worst pains I had and different than all the others. But then the rest of him was out before I knew it.

I remember when Rasmia held Orion up, I felt this look of disbelief spread over my face. Of course, I knew there was a baby coming, but somehow seeing him for the first time was still a shock. It was like I couldn’t believe something that big just came out of me! She did a little bit of suctioning, and then I got to hold him. Ron and I were both overcome with emotion. You can see it in our faces in the pictures. We stayed in the water for a bit and kept pouring water over the baby to keep him warm.

Here he is, moments old.


After a little bit, Ron got out and took Orion because it was time for me to birth the placenta. Rasmia kindof tugged on it to get it out, which surprised me because I remembered reading somewhere you are not supposed to do that . Oh well – nothing bad happened. I got out of the water after that and all of a sudden started shivering uncontrollably. It was really strange because I didn’t feel cold, but it was like having a chill you just can’t get rid of. They said it was because of hormones. (Those mysterious hormones - they get blamed for everything in a women's life.) I got on the bed and they piled towels on me. I was in there for a while because Rasmia had to put stitches in and one of the tears was in an unusual place which required her to put a catheter in.

Here is dad having some bonding time while I get stitched up.

And sister having her time.


Orion gets his first checkup.


Sarah started calling relatives, and I am not even sure when Rasmia left. It must have been pretty late – around 3 or so. Here is Orion checking out the nunus.

We are in awe...

And finally, the first family portrait. Yes, that is a chicken leg in my hand. Gogo Pollo Loco.

Testing

Just checking to see how far back I can backdate.

Beach!