Touching Story from My Dad

Something reminded me today of a story my dad told me while I was in CA. I didn't mention it before and it had kindof slipped my mind until I told Ron about it. Now that I have spent more time thinking about it and recognizing its power, I want to make sure to write it down.

I wish I could remember all the details, but the most important part is fresh in my memory. He was talking about what a terrible temper his dad had, which seemed weird to me, because he was always so quiet by the time I knew him. But I guess he wasn't always that way. My dad's family was pretty poor when he was growing up. He was telling me how they usually just got one pair of boots per year. My dad had just gotten his and something happened to them. That is the part I can't remember, but it was a total accident. He went home to tell his mom, and she encouraged him to just tell his dad the truth.

Well, for that he got the beating of his life. Of course beating kids was more common back then, but this must have been bad even for that time because mom stepped in to stop him. She even gave him an earful about how his son had been brave enough to tell him the truth and this is what he got. I guess he calmed down later and came back to apologize... and gave him a dollar, which was alot of money back then. But my dad said all he could think was, "I don't want a dollar, I want a dad who loves me."

Oh my gosh, when I told Ron this story, I totally started crying! I wasn't even sure why at first, (besides being pregnant of course haha), but I figured it was telling me to look deeper at it. My first thought was that beatings and distant dads were more common back then. My dad has always been a pretty sensitive guy, so it just broke my heart thinking about him as a little boy with all of that longing intact, even in a culture where it wasn't the norm. I think it also gave me a sense of kinship with him, knowing that he understood the primacy of loving your kids above all else.

My dad had his own temper and whipped me from time to time, but he only really beat me once. Ironically, it was right after his mother died. So I know he was distraught, but I was angry about it for a long time. After this story I couldn't help but wonder how bad he felt about it. I think it was the first time I really forgave him for it.